feeling normal again...

So how long has it been???

I had kind of given up on this blog thing. I thought it was all a load of crap, but when I gave it a read today I felt like I should give it another try. I've got nothing better to do at 4:40am anyhow. I think I was in a real pissy mood the last few blogs I wrote...today I'm in a really good mood!

I guess over the last month or so I have achieved a remission. No serious symptoms. I had a bout with some hypomania in February and I've really been struggling with fatigue, but I think the bipolar is in check so to speak.

I started Weight Watchers about 10 weeks ago and I've lost 26 pounds so things are good on that front. I'm still way over weight, but a solid year of binge eating will do that to a person. I guess there is hope. I just need to hang in there and continue with what I'm doing. The wife is really trying to get me in to running. It's done wonders for her. I just need to take the plunge. I bought a $100 pair of shoes that are just sitting in my closet. Exercise is suppose to be great for mood stabilization, but I'm just lazy.

Jane (my therapist) had cut me back to every other week and last week she said she didn't think I needed to come but once a month. I've got to admit I'm a little freaked out. I've gotten so use to seeing Jane and the doc all the time that doing things on my own seems a little scary, but I guess my treatment team is trying to send me a message. Maybe I'm not that fucked up after all. Maybe I'm actually stable for once. Who would have thought that could happen.

The fatigue was a real issue and I think sticking to a good sleep schedule has helped more than anything. I've pretty much come to terms with the fact that if I'm going to work graveyard I'm going to have to live nocturnal all the time. I function so much better when go to bed and get up at the same time everyday. I had added 4000mg Rhodiola for about 5 weeks to see if it would help with energy, but I didn't really see results. Then about a month ago I started 3000mg of sublingual B12 and 400mg D3. Then last week I changed from a B stress to a B100 complex. Anyhow all vitamins aside the sleep schedule is what is making me feel the best and the most chipper. I still struggle with getting out of bed. I don't know what it is with me, but getting up is just a drag. Once I'm up I don't feel depressed or anything I just have trouble getting out from under the covers.

I switched my fish oil over to a supplement called Omega Mood. I'm taking two 1000mg capsules and it has a 1000mg of EPA and 150 mg of DHA. I also switched over to Magnesium Glycinate. I'm taking 400mg. The Citrate was giving me gut trouble. The meds are all the same as usual. This will be the first time i've gone a full three months between visits to the doc in at least a year and a half. I see him in July some time.

Things are good I guess! I'm posting this to psycobabble. So maybe some of you guys on babble can subscribe and comment...

Peace

-mellow

The current cocktail...

Risperdal 2mg
Celexa 20mg
Topamax 50mg
Lamictal 100mg

Multi Vitamin
Omega Mood 2000mg
Magnesium Glycinate 400mg
Vitamin D3 400mg
B Complex 100
B12 3000mg